Why Canada Owns the North Pole


Now it seems that the hated Danes are at in again, trying to take away Canada's arctic sovereignty by claiming that they own the North Pole. This is ridiculous! If anything, the two superpowers involved in dividing up the north with national boundaries have more claim than a Scandinavian country.

As everyone in Canada knows, the North Pole was discovered in 1902 by French-Canadian lumberjack  Black Jacques Shellac. He had originally set out on a trek looking for a place to hide Bugs Bunny's body after he'd done away with him, but instead discovered a place that is distinctly Canadian.

But as the 20th century progressed, there were upheavals and camaraderie's that fell apart. The North Pole could have been something that caused nuclear annihilation for all of earth's inhabitants as two enemies constantly circled each other there. Luckily, from the 1950's to the 1980's, things didn't turn into an all out war. What I'm talking about is how the North Pole is the disputed home of both Santa Clause and Superman.

Now as Canada sits at the table discussing arctic sovereignty with a man who gives all of the world children's gifts at Christmas, and another that is more powerful than a locomotive, don't try to invite yourself to these negotiations, Denmark!

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